Top 10 Ways to Spend Your Stimulus Bill Money

Posted February 11, 2008
Filed under: Humor, Random, Satirical | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , |

Well now that it seems a bunch of people are gonna get a couple extra bucks by the federal government, we should figure out what to do with it. Here are a couple suggestions I wrote for my campus newspaper The Slant (I’d link you, but the website sucks)

You could spend it on…

10. $600 of chocolate for Valentine’s Day.
9. Anything but your sub-prime mortage payment.
8. A Wii! Oh wait…
7. Finally beating that asshole who always outbids you on Ebay.
6. Charity, obviously.
5. The first spam email you get.
4. Shorting stocks on the NYSE
3. Rehab for an Iraq-related injury
2. Enough crap from Wal-mart to stimulate an African country’s economy.
1. A Pony!

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humor-blogs spends it all on crack. Mountains and mountains of CRACK!

5 comments so far

  1. bvllets on February 11, 2008

    Who the hell is Stimulus Bill and what does he want for his money?

  2. amuirin on February 12, 2008

    10, 1.

    Tough one.

    I like the idea of the first spam e-mail you get, just cus it’s a wild-card, but I get so many damn spams for penis enlargement….

  3. Rose on February 12, 2008

    i fully intend to spend it on cheap alcohol and easy boys! ;o)

  4. Stevo on February 13, 2008

    Crack and whores. Can’t go wrong.

  5. Kayfour on February 14, 2008

    A pony! Why didn’t I think of that!


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